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So You Think You Want to Work in IT

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In case you've been living under a rock, CharTec is growing like crazy! Yes, we are looking into increasing our staff and would love to hire some awesome people to fill the gaps. So, if you're thinking about working for a startup IT Company based out of the sunny Ag and Oil hub of smoggy Bakersfield, CA, then do we have a job for you! If you want to land a job and ace your interview, here are a few tips to help you make it past the security guards and back to HR:

1. Relax, it's only your future, so be yourself. We'll let you know if you can finally stop flipping burgers or not.

2. Great, you know buzz words like "cloud" and "BYOD," that's fantastic...no one cares—unless you can tell us the best BDR configuration to virtualize 10 servers during a flood from your iPhone. If not, then we can't use you.

3. Don't make jokes about rainbows. Our mascot is a rainbow zebra...have you ever seen a pissed off zebra charge? I didn't think so. We haven't either and we'd like to keep it that way, thanks.

4. No, you cannot have an interview via Skype. If you ask for us to join a Google+ hangout for the interview, that's an auto-fail.

5. If you get stuck on a question, make us laugh, please. Don't rack your brain and give us faulty or just wrong information. So, Mr. Candidate, how exactly does virtualization work? One acceptable answer could sound like: "Well, you see, after the bear climbs up the tree to get the honey, he climbs down the tree, runs across a field, and then climbs up another tree. And that's basically how virtualization works." If you're non- technical, this is an acceptable answer. If you are going for a tech position, you're fired (in Donald Trump voice).

6. If you are trying to get out of your mother's basement or garage and spend your time playing WOW or throwing LAN parties, please be sure to pick up an application and we'll schedule you for an interview right away!

7. Please dress the part. If you have cleavage, please cover up. It reduces the productivity of our technicians.

8. We are a tech company, meaning we have cameras everywhere! So if you think you're going to walk in here acting rude to the receptionist and smelling like feet, guess what? We know what the smell is because of Google Nose...isn't technology amazing?

9. Don't talk about how large your stolen or torrent music collection is, or how you're running Office 2013 from a volume license key you stole from Pirate Bay. We are a reseller of Microsoft products and have enough problems with the SPLA police; we don't need your broke, stealing software antics in the company.

10. Okay, seriously, we are a fun company! We like to have taco and beer for Friday lunch and we have a gym. It's a pretty awesome place to work whether you're technical or not; the most important thing is to take your work seriously and to have a sense of humor. If you meet those (and the other 9 points), I invite you to visit our careers page and see where you fit into the CharTec family.

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  • Nathan Gillette
    Nathan Gillette Friday, 06 February 2015

    You sure don't appear to be a "Startup IT Company" any more, Gabe. CharTec's growth is seriously impressive. Your collection of equally impressive reviews has me wanting to come join your team rather than pursue building my own!

    I came here just to signup for a LabTech RMM TradeShow and found myself reading your reviews and digging out my resume instead. I did try to apply for an open position, but the form broke on me with some weird error code message. That's alright, I'm persistent and will try, try again, later.

    Re-reading your post and fun environment, I'm sure you're going to laugh your head off when you see my equally humorous cover letter. I cracked jokes in it more often than you did... such as quitting an otherwise good job to avoid being arrested for animal cruelty for a conspiracy to murder the boss's office parrot. Apparently "the evil parrot forced me to quit!" isn't a valid reason to collect unemployment.

    Most people think parrots are cool because they can talk - so did I during the interview. An I.T. job with a bird as your direct manager, great huh? Dead wrong, parrots are the most evil animal on this planet. They seldom talk; they're far too busy screeching louder than an airhorn all day like a crying baby. They're smart, too. That bird knew I hated it and would start straight at me, mocking my inability to silence it without losing my job. The only way I made it through my day was thinking of ways to get even with that parrot for the hundreds of migraine headaches. I did come up with a plan, give it a heart-attack with an air-horn an inch from it's evil face, playing it's own deafening game... but I resigned before that plot played out.

    If you think your noisy co-worker is bad, just be glad they don't have an air-horn to blast 10 feet from your head and break your concentration every few minutes of every 8 hour day, every day of the week. Yes, my cover letter is like this but worse - you'll never see another like it again. Your staff can all have a good laugh at it while eating free company food and trying to choose between beer or Starbucks to drink. If you read this today, Gabe... feel free to contact me with an e-mail address to submit that cover letter to, since the form apparently doesn't want me to work there - I'd appreciate it.

    Oh, and if you schedule an interview just for some more laughs, I'd prefer to use IRC to talk; Skype and Google+ are way too fancy and shiny for me.

    - Nathan in Fresno

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